Kat’s Adventures in Dating: The 6 out of 10

Five stars

I met Gary on OKCupid when I was living in Albuquerque. He was a pharmacist and a bodybuilder, and one of my friends knew him. 

“He’s got a real thick South Valley accent,” she told me, “but other than that, he’s cool.” 

We chatted back and forth on Google Chat for a while and went out on a date – dinner and drinks, probably. We had some chemistry but didn’t kiss goodnight. He even brought up his accent.

“I sound like a real mocho,” he said. 

(He did. I’m fine with accents. Generally like them, in fact.) 

I invited him to come to a movie at the Southwest Gay and Lesbian Film Fest with me, since I’d gotten free passes. He agreed.

Continue reading “Kat’s Adventures in Dating: The 6 out of 10”

Kat’s Adventures in Dating: The Failures to Launch

As a veteran of the online dating scene, I am fully subscribed to the idea that you should meet in person as soon as you are able (and comfortable enough) to do so. A lot of my friends will spend weeks texting with someone on the app, not exchanging phone numbers or even last names, before they feel comfortable enough to set a time and date and see someone’s face in real life. This is, to me, the death of all possible chemistry. If we can’t meet within about a week of matching, it’s just never gonna’ work for me.

Every once in a while, I’ll match with someone on a dating site and plan to meet them, but something will stop that meeting from happening. And often it’s something the guy has done that makes me really just not want to meet up with them. Here are a few examples.

Continue reading “Kat’s Adventures in Dating: The Failures to Launch”

Kat’s Adventures in Dating: The Bernese Mountain Dog

A Bernese Mountain Dog

When I lived in northern New Jersey in my youth, I’d go into the City (that’s New York City, generally Manhattan, for anyone who has never lived in that metropolitan area) often for grad school classes or to see friends. The train schedules and bus schedules were made more for daytime commuters than nighttime revelers (or students), so I’d drive my little red Mazda Miata and find parking on the street in the West Village. I only got towed once, and I was never late to class because of parking, so I was pretty lucky.

One buzzy Friday night I got dolled up and went into town to visit Theo, a guy I’d been seeing for a few weeks. We had gone to the same high school but didn’t know each other until we were both living in/around NYC. He was a grad student in philosophy (you’re right, that should have been a red flag) and he was also very emotionally volatile which, well, I was too. I have always had this insufferable fantasy about falling in love with a “hometown boy” that I had everything in common with but had gotten out to see the world like me, so he scratched some funny itch. He was also tall with broad shoulders and nice eyes, which helped. 

Continue reading “Kat’s Adventures in Dating: The Bernese Mountain Dog”

Kat’s Adventures in Dating: The Absurd One

The Cabaret show flyer

I’ve decided to document some of my most memorable moments in dating, per a friend’s request. I’ve changed the names and am reusing the same five or six names, partly to hide people’s identities but also partly because I can’t remember half of their names anymore anyway. I hope you’ll find them as entertaining or interesting as I do… now that I’m past them.

John and I were talking exclusively on a dating app – we hadn’t exchanged phone numbers yet. But our chatting was going well and he threw me the hottest line a man can ever send me, on a dating app or otherwise:

“I have tickets to a show on Saturday night at 7pm. Wanna join?” 

SWOON.

Continue reading “Kat’s Adventures in Dating: The Absurd One”